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Tis the season for New Year’s Resolutions. Everyone’s talking about them, but here’s what they’re not talking about - Have you ever set a goal and accomplished it (yay!), but then you immediately felt empty, just not quite satisfied.
I’ve been there.
I would reach a goal, but almost immediately I would feel let down. I came to later understand that my goals weren’t really aligned to me. I was either doing things to please others or trying to show the world what I could do. And I was just moving way too fast to even think about any of it.
Then - it hit me. I was a hamster on a wheel!
So I took a step back. I thought about what was REALLY important to me. I aligned to that vision and respect I had for myself. And that’s when I was able to reach goals, and feel good about it. And, not coincidentally, that’s when my true gift came out.
I discovered a few things that we tend to do when setting goals that can really backfire:
Goals for the sake of goal-setting: First of all, we set a goal that may not be aligned to who we really are and what we really want. Asking yourself why the goal is important to you is a good place to start. You might discover it’s feeding your ego or impressing your friends or family (looking externally for some sort of approval or acceptance).
Just going along for the ride: Secondly, we’re setting ourselves up to not enjoy the journey, to only be happy when we reach the goal. We push push push to reach those goals, yet internally, often without awareness, we resist those very goals we set ourselves! The definition of stress is resisting! We ‘suffer’ through just to reach the goal.
#Overboard: Third, we often end up over-doing in one area and then another area suffers.
I’ll give you another personal example from my life. I worked SO HARD to earn magna cum laude in college. I was a non-traditional student, with a full-time job and a child to raise. At the end of each semester, I was sick. I had depleted myself in order to obtain this goal. I’m sure other areas were suffering as well!
So here’s where GRIT comes in and saves the day. GRIT is about aligning to and respecting yourself so that you can live happily and productively. It is about tenacity and perseverance, courage and passion, and it’s also about knowing and accepting yourself so you can give your gift to the world.
Hold on. Did you give that paragraph the attention it deserves? Let’s back up and re-read that because it’s important!
The key point there is: GRIT allows you to give your gift to the world.
You have a gift that you are here to give (probably more than one, but let’s just focus on one for now). Using the GRIT roadmap, in order to be authentically Generous, we need to Respect ourselves and others, and align to ourselves with Integrity.
You have a gift that you are here to give (probably more than one, but let’s just focus on one for now). Using the GRIT roadmap, in order to be authentically Generous, we need to Respect ourselves and others, and align to ourselves with Integrity.
The only way to do this is to first know and accept our own Truth, so we start with Truth and work our way back to Generosity:
Truth
Explore who you are, what makes you happy, why you get up in the morning, what’s most important to you and why.
Accept where you are right now. Appreciate your journey, everything you’ve learned along the way.
Consider what you’d like to change, how you’d like to feel, what you’d like to give to others that aligns with you?
Integrity
Think about the activities you need to do to realize what you want. We call these High Value Activities. Stay tuned for our webinar this month to learn more about HVAs!
To get in the habit of performing these activities, write them down each night before bed and read them each morning. This will train your brain.
If you’re stuck, not moving, one of my favorite methods is Mel Robbins 5 Second Rule (and no, it’s not the one about picking up what you dropped on the floor and it’s ok to eat it lol - but it is about taking fast action!). Take a look at how Mel suggests we get out of procrastination mode!
Respect
Appreciate yourself. Feel gratitude for the things you have. Even feeling gratitude for the things you desire, your future state, helps you accept these things into your life.
Respect what you need to be healthy, creative, productive, loving, and generous. Be mindful of all the areas of your life that need attention.
Respect others. There’s an entire planet of us with our own truths!
Generosity
Give yourself what you need.
When you align yourself to what’s most important to you, stay true to yourself with integrity and respect, you will naturally give back to others.
You’ll feel abundance rather than scarcity. You’ll want to give, rather than feeling like you have to. Generosity becomes effortless and enjoyable.
With GRIT, goal setting becomes fun and you create a lifestyle around it, rather than a short-term system that you resist.
So... I want to hear from you! In my next webinar, we’re talking about How to NAIL Your Goals - With GRIT. I’ll address the challenges faced when working toward your goals and how you can use the GRIT model to overcome them. We answer questions LIVE in that webinar, so if you’ve got a particular roadblock ahead of you with your goals, hit me with your challenge and we’ll work together to help you overcome it!
Click here to register for the free live webinar, How to NAIL Your Goals - With GRIT on February 1, 2018 at 2pm EST.
Cheers!
Laurie